Mei Tai It Up! (a 'tutorial')

Oh Michelle will be so happy, I finally got my booty in gear and posted these instructions. Background: Bff is having second baby and is a skinny minny on the slim side so Baby Bjorn style carriers just weren't cutting it for her (as they don't for most women in comparison to a better carrier I'm finding out, which is bologna for the $80-$100 price tags on those things!). So, she tells me about a carrier she is looking at, and I think (much to the pride of my frugal roots) "I wonder if I could make that". A quick internet search reveals that, yes, someone smarter than I has already laid the foundation of instructions and I figure I can alter the design slightly to be more like the carrier my friend would like. Oh, and did I mention I had a 4-ish month old and figured I'd make one for me as "practice"...I know, sacrifice. Anyways, here's what I did, with some pictures, in case any of you would like to design and make your own versatile kangaroo pouch.

I took inspiration from another blog online and these instructions combine the techniques:  http://scanditute.blogspot.com/

Materials:

From http://scanditute.blogspot.com/: Strap fabric (the brown twill in the pic): “2.5 yards of strap fabric. When choosing your strap fabric - it is important to select a bottom-weight fabric like canvas, denim or twill with a minimum weight of 7 oz. Actually, 10 oz. is better. Baby cord is not strong enough for a baby carrier. NOTE: There has been a lot of recent discussion about the suitability of corduroy for mei tai straps. Cord is a compromised fabric because the pile inside the wales has been cut, thus weakening it. If you do intend to use cord for your mei tai, I can not stress enough how important it is to make sure that the cord is strong. Hold it up to the light before sewing with it. If you can see light through the fabric, it probably isn't strong enough. Cord carriers have ripped in several instances because the fabric used was not strong enough to support the weight of a baby. Please exercise utmost caution when using cord. For what it's worth, I now only make mei tais with heavy canvas (8-10 oz) or twill. In addition to being safer choices, sturdy, strong fabrics also offer the most support and comfort.”

Other fabric:

¾ yard outer design fabric. (Flower patterned cotton in the pic)

¾ yard lining fabric. (Pink Minky in the pic) Minky or Fleece works well and is snuggly soft, a friend of mine also used another design fabric and made it “reversible” (it will look a little different on the other side because of the way it is put together, but it works the same)

An 18" square of heavy canvas. (Cream colored piece you can just see under the designed fabric in the pic)

Some fleece or cotton batting for padding the waist and shoulder straps. (I used polar fleece, easy to work with and was cheap on sale/with coupon) This is where I cannot remember exactly how much you will need. You will need 2- 12x20 inch squares, 1- 12x17inch square, and another 2-4 layers for the padded upper piece. I think a yard is plenty, but check my math.

Thread: I used button/craft thread for sewing the straps on the canvas to make sure it is secure, but heads up, some sewing machines have a hard time sewing with this thread so check your manufacturer’s instructions for information. If it says it will be difficult to sew denim, it may be difficult to sew the canvas with this thread.

Coordinating, high-quality thread like Gutermann for the rest of the project.

Make sure you wash and press all of your fabric before beginning (I even washed the canvas and air dried to make sure I could wash and air dry the Mei Tai when it was finished).

I can tell you that I found twill on sale (40 or 50%) off, and spent about $45 total. You could get cheaper even if you really focused on shopping with coupons and for go the fancier fabric. It is well worth this price, to me, though as these carriers sell for $100 and up.

Step One- Straps:

Finished straps will be 4" wide by 74”-84" long, so measure 9" across the short end of your strap fabric (will give you a 1/2" seam allowance) and measure the length of your choice + 4” on the long end (add another 4” to the finished length for canvas attachment)

“Note: 84” are really long straps. You might want to make them up to 10" shorter. I like to tie Tibetan in a back carry, so I make them longer for me. If you decide to make the shoulder straps shorter, make sure you keep the waist strap around 80-84".”

If you desire, cut the straps at an angle on one end if you prefer a taper.

Next, sew the shoulder straps: with right sides together, stitch the straps from the point of the taper to the end. Turn right side out and press.

For the padding - I used a layer of polar fleece - cut 12"x20" Then, fold the long ends to meet in the center and then fold that in half (so raw ends are tucked inside). I always make a little tack stitch on the ends and the center so it stays together while I'm stuffing it into the straps.

Now, to stuff the straps- Fold the top 8-10 inches of the strap down like you're turning down the cuff of socks. Stuff one end of the batting inside and pull the strap material up over the batting. Use kitchen tongs or a yardstick to help in keeping it flat and even. Stuff it far enough inside so that you have at least four inches of strap material left at the top. (Yes, this takes a little effort to get done) Stitch three equally-spaced lines down the length of the padding in the straps. (I did the two outer lines first and then finished with the middle line to make it easier to get the spacing even)

Step Two- Cut Body and Attach Straps:

For the body of the Mei Tai, you'll need to cute the pattern from: one layer of your decorator fabric, one layer of the liner or reverse (minky, fleece, or another decorator fabric if you want it to be reversible to that), and one layer of heavy canvas for the inside.

Here is a pic of the pattern the http://scanditute.blogspot.com/ blog had and here are her instructions: This pattern is “Cut on the FOLD. The body is 8" wide at the middle, 18" tall. The flat part at the top is 5" and the part where the shoulder straps attach is also 5". You may choose to make your pattern a few inches taller if you have an older baby. This pattern will yield a MT approximately 17"-17.5" tall.”

So, you can draw out and make your own pattern.

                                              

Now, my husband has this wonderful program called AutoCAD for his work, with which he so nicely designed a pattern for me. I can send this pattern to you if you ask for it, in PDF form, but I will warn you that it is in 11x17 format (because we conveniently have a printer this size, again for his work). The seam allowance (dotted line) for this pattern is 3/8”. This pattern is really only for the shape of the top edge and for the padded upper piece (more on that later). So, what I did was to trace the top edge p ortion (the smaller shape on the pattern that looks like the contour on the pic above) onto the top of a piece of tissue paper and then measured 18” down from the middle, marked my bottom line, and then drew a straight line from the bottom of the curve edge to this bottom line, viola, I had a reproducible pattern. The long, straight side is ON THE FOLD. We’ll get to the top piece later. Here are the 3 body pieces cut out with the pattern.

Next you prep canvas and attach straps. First, fold down the 3/8" seam allowance on the canvas body panel where the shoulder straps will attach and press.

Then, pin the straps centered on the body. Tip: roll up the straps and secure with a rubber band to keep things neat while you're stitching.

Stitch around the straps with a square and an X in the center. This is where I used the heavy duty button/craft thread. I also doubled this line (so stitched twice total). This is all because this area is what will carry the weight of baby, and I wanted it to be very secure. If you sew the lines in this order:

Then you can do it all in one shot without having to cut thread and move the needle.

Step Four- Make and attach the Padded Upper:

I traced the pattern for the upper (the larger shape that looks like the pieces below) onto tissue paper. This is CUT ON THE FOLD. Then, cut two pieces of your strap fabric (coordinates so well!) and 2-4 pieces out of your fleece or batting (I forgot to take pics of these pieces, same shape though) depending on the thickness you want, thick is nice for this padding and helps it stay up well. It helps to cut the padding layers at least 3/8” smaller than the  outer fabric pieces so they fit inside easily.

With right sides together, sew the top edges of the outer fabric pieces together leaving the bottom edge open, turn right side out, and press with the bottom edge seam allowance folded under. Fit the fleece/batting inside this cover piece and trim if you need so this lays nice a flat. You may want to tack the fleece/batting pieces together before placing them all inside the cover. (Sorry, again I forgot a picture of this part).

Prep your outer design carrier fabric by pressing under the seam allowance at the shoulder. Now, place your outer design fabric face up and lay the padded upper piece on top of it, lining up the curved edges and pin in place (again, I forgot to take a picture of this step, but it will look something like this, just without the sewn lines and finished edges).

Now sew the along bottom edge of the padded upper, the first horizontal line of the padding, and the edge between these two lines all to the design fabric for the Mei Tai Body. I know this is a little confusing… you can see the line I sewed in this pic (from the backside- it’s easier to see, although I sewed with it facing up):

Step Five- Assemble Body Pieces:

Pin the outer design fabric (with the padded upper) facing down on top of the liner (i.e. right sides together). It helps to fold and pin the padded upper piece down on top of itself at the horizontal line you sewed previously, so it will be tucked inside the pieces pinned together. You want to make sure that the padded upper is OUT OF THE WAY of sewing during this part.

Stitch with a 3/8" seam allowance SKIPPING OVER the part where the shoulder straps are attached. Don't worry about stitching the bottom closed. This will be sandwiched in the waist strap anyway.

Turn inside out, pull the straps through, unfold the padded upper, and press. The front will look something like this:

Now, at those shoulder straps, where you've folded under the canvas and liner fabrics, you'll see you now have neat layers. Fold the decorator fabric under and pin through the straps and all layers.

Topstitch around the entire body of the carrier, except the bottom, very close to the edge. You will be sewing through the padded upper in this stage. You can simply sew the edge and next horizontal line through the padding at the top edge of the Mei Tai body. Then, you can go ahead and stitch one more horizontal line through the padding to finish it. I’ve brightened up one of the pictures to show these lines a little better.

It can be tricky to catch all the layers while stitching around the padded upper, so take your time. I’ve also had to go back and sew another line at the places where the shoulder straps attach to catch all the layers and folds, and it looks fine when it’s all finished.  

This topstitching will close all the holes and give the carrier a nice, finished look.

Step Six- Waist Strap:

Take the last strap and cut a taper on both ends if desired. Stitch right sides together, leaving an 18" hole in the center. Turn right side out and press. (I went ahead and did this when I made the first two straps)

Measure a 12"x17" piece of polar fleece, fold it like you did for the shoulder straps, insert the bottom few inches of the body of the carrier inside the padding. Here’s a pic of a different Mei Tai with the polar fleece folded around the bottom:

Sandwich the fleece and the bottom of the Mei Tai body inside the hole in the waist strap, turn the raw ends of the strap under, and pin.

Top stitch to close the opening and then stitch horizontal lines through the padding for security and comfort.

Finished! Here’s a couple that I have made so far:

Step Seven- Wear Baby and Enjoy!:

I have found this too be a comfortable and EXTREMELY versatile carrier. I've used it for front carries, hip carries, and back carries (even hiking in Yellowstone). I've also carried my older daughter (when she was almost 3) in it through Costco when she had fallen asleep in the car and wouldn't easily wake up. Here is a site that has some directions for some carries in this type of carrier: http://kozycarrier.homestead.com/instructions.html

 Make sure you learn how to tie the Mei Tai safely and effectively, you are carrying precious cargo!

~ FOR PERSONAL USE ONLY ~

                                                

Heaven is for Real

As you can see, I'm about to get faith-ful on ya, but please stick around regardless of your beliefs because I think this is an important part of me. I am not very Evangelical, it's not my strength, but I do hope that the light of Christ in my life shines out through me and may at some point make someone think "hmm, maybe there's something special there" cause there is, just sayin. I am writing this post because sometimes something crosses your path and makes you fall to your knees, so to speak. Well, a few months ago my sister mentioned this book to me, Heaven is for Real, and then last week she gave it to me. Good timing because a couple of nights ago I finished my pile of "to reads" and was ready to pick up a new book last night. So, I picked up this pretty short (155 page) book at 10:30 at night to read a little before bed. Well, I put it down, finished, early this morning. I am NOT that kind of reader anymore, even my fave kind of books have the tendency to put me to sleep in my tired Mommy state, so when I told my husband this morning even he said "You FINISHED it!" If you get no further in this post, then please pick up this book and read, even if it's just for fun, or a "what are those crazy Christians talking about now" kind of read. Here, though, is my "Heaven is for Real" kind of story because I don't just believe that God answers prayers and is present in my life, I KNOW it.

If you are/know any Christians than you know there is the "asking God and Jesus into your heart" moment. Well, that's really where I begin because I think about it every once in a while. I was 6 years old and a busy kid who loved to pretend and play just about anything. I was also in Sunday school, and I'm sure one Sunday our teachers told us about asking God or Jesus into our hearts, I really don't remember these details. What I do remember in vivid detail (which they call flash bulb memories in psychology I've now learned, by the way) was the moment I asked God into my heart. I was sitting with one leg tucked under me and my other knee by my chin, next to the air conditioning vent in our living room playing with a peice of paper in the cold air comming from the vent, and I remembered "oh yeah, I have to ask God into my heart" so I closed my eyes and prayed in the way a 6 year old knows how "Dear Jesus, please come into my heart and stay there forever, thank you" Then I opened my eyes and got up and ran into our kitchen. That's all I remember of that day, but the point is I REMEMBER it, in vivid detail. I'm sure I pretended to be lots of things at that age, but they are vague memories of a beautiful childhood, not pinpoint. I also remember feeling light and happy, like I'd just accomplished something, which I remember seeming silly since all I'd done was ask God to come into my heart when I already knew He surrounded me everyday. I now know I had accomplished something, the most important something of my life.

I could take you through numerous examples of God working in very tangible ways in my life, I don't know where it really begins or ends, it just always has been. I know one of them was meeting my husband, because had it not been for Christ we would not have come together and Tim has been one of the greatest gifts God has given me. I want to focus for now though again on my Mom and my journey with her disease and death. I know I've spoken of her in some depth in another post here but I want to tell the whole story.

My Mom was diagnosed with brain cancer the summer before I went into 8th grade. This timing, well sucked. I was an ackward, at best, young teen and had never really faced any difficulty and was not even close to prepared for the year that was to come. My Mom's 13 hour surgery came and went very well, we were surrounded by friends and family lifting us up and what I thought would be the hardest single part of this journey would turn out to be by far the easiest. After surgery came radiation, and this is where the troubles began. I don't even remember all of the hospitalizations and challenges during this period, but one example was a point where Mom got really really sick, lethargic, and out of it. When my Dad took her to the hospital they found out that her blood sugar level (which at the very high end of "normal" is 180) was 1300, and she could have died if he hadn't took her in. This was a complication, turns out, of the steriods they were giving her to control the swelling in her brain from radiation treatment and we were totally unprepared for it. Between all of these side effects and things happening Mom just was too sick to be Mom. She was in and out of the hospital, I remember she had to be in the hospital that year for Christmas, which was incredibly hard on me. We were taking over the household things, and were trying desperately to cling to some sense of normalcy. It was during this time that I began writing, and have very poignant verses from these days:

A Cry

A cry in the dark sent her in
To her child's side, My Side

Through my life her love kept growing
My light in the darkest of nights

So many nights now I am weeping
In need of her constant care

But even love unending
Can hide in darkness and despair

I'm scared, I'm crying
To no prevail

"Where oh where is my Mommy"
Where oh where is her care?

I can hear my Father weeping
even though he hides his tears

I can see my Sisters heart breaking
hiding nothing all is fear

I sit here lost and lonely
knowing there is little I can do

My whole life is slipping
sliding like my tears

Where I turn to
Where I go

Because I know You are out there watching
Caring for me so Dear

Written when I was just 13 years old, and it makes me cry to write it now because I can not imagine that child (for I was) that was hurting so very much. As these verses indicate, I clutched to my faith during this time, but I won't say this fixed everything. I will never forget laying in my little bed one night, aching so deeply, crying as hard as I've ever cried saying "Please God, I just want a hug, just give me a hug, it hurts too much". But, no giant arms reached through the ceiling to pick me up out of the hurt. The answer to that prayer was yet to come which I did not understand and just hurt so very deeply. My "friends" were 13 year olds just like me who couldn't handle navigating their own lives, let alone the struggles I was having, so I lost most of my friends except one amazing friend, Karina. I drifted through my classes, my school life in general, looking for nothing more than something away from the hurt I felt inside. I remember that year having several suicidal thoughts, but felt like I couldn't share this with my family because I thought it would be too much more of a burden on them. I thank God today that through his grace and my friendship with Karina (a friend from church, I might add) I made it through that period even though I hadn't reached out for help.  We came through it as a family, and my Mom healed and was well as I entered high school and life seemed to be getting back to "normal".

Our indication that the journey was not yet finished came as my Mom started forgetting little things. Now, if you know me then you know a little of what my Mom was like. She was an amazingly organized, thoughtful, and make-it-look-easy multitasker. Then at first, she'd get a little confused, then she had a hard time at work, eventually being asked to resign when I was a senior in high school, and by and by her mind slipped away more and more. My last best memory of her was the weekend of orientation we spent together at CU. She was determined to be present and supportive of me in every way possible. I, of course, was a headstrong 18 year old girl ready for my freedom. It was a nice weekend, though, that we spent walking the campus together and talking about how the school was, and how proud of me she was. She always was and always expressed it. I love her still for this, because my self confidence now is a by product of this. During my first semester of college, this Mom I knew, ever present and involved, taking care of anything and everything I needed, slipped away. By second semester freshmen year I was taking care of everything from finances to my health care that I had so recently taken completely for granted. I now know that this fostered an indepence and strength that I needed in life, but at the time I threw a pretty good self-pitty party and racked up substantial student loans to "give myself what I needed since I had to now". If I'd asked, I could have gotten more help, I just didn't know that I should. During this time, I "met" Tim. Really, what happened was that I recognized Tim from our shared history so we became friends and quickly more. God gave me someone special, and I know this saved me in many ways, but that is another story.

I don't remember when Mom started having her "episodes" but she would get a headache, get really confused, and then seem to recover, if not entirely back to her previous self. My sister had moved in with my parents at this point to help out. The doctors would rule out major strokes or other issues, but my Mom again spent periods of time in the hospital. A moment here came when I was home visiting my Mom in the hospital when a neurosurgeon came to talk to us, Dr. S. Yup, I still rememeber his name and will NEVER recommend him (a word of caution to cavalier Dr's, we are not mindless sheep, we will remember your name for decades and your attitudes and behaviors will catch up to you). Basically, Dr. S to me, my sister, and my Mom (who was concious, just a little confused at this point) insinuated that trying to figure out a diagnosis or treatment was pointless considering the "quality of life" it would offer my Mom. Yup, he basically said it would be better to give up on her than to fight the fight which SHE STILL WANTED TO FIGHT. My Mom basically thought she was dying, good job Doc, way to follow the Hippocratic Oath. Up until that moment we had been fighting hard to try to help my Mom, focusing on the positive and hope, but in that moment I felt like I'd been punched in the stomach and deflated. I went out into the hallway and let it all out in a flood of sobs and tears, thinking "Not AGAIN, I CAN'T go through THAT again". I'm sure I looked a mess and would have attracted attention, but what came next shook me so deeply it gives me goosebumps today. As I cried, a nurse came up to me, handed me a box of kleenex, and gave me a hug (which after becoming a nurse I know isn't extremely common either). Then, another visitor at the hospital came up to me and gave me a hug. Next a hospital chaplain came up to me, asked if he could pray for me and gave me a hug. Then, my sister came out into the hallway and held me in her arms, and we shared our hurt together. After I had calmed down and was by this time sitting on the floor against the wall, I thought "In all the time I've been in hospitals I've never had that many people all of a sudden pop out of nowhere just to give me a hug". Suddenly, I had one of those "flashbacks" to laying in bed all those years ago crying out to God for a HUG. Tears started streaming down my face again, but not because I was sad. I realized that the prayer I'd felt had gone unanswered and hurt from so deeply had not gone unheard. God had LISTENED to me and in this next close to breakdown moment HE would NOT let me feel that alone again. We are God's body, and you may touch someone in ways you cannot even imagine with something as simple as a hug.

 In December of 2003, our Junior year of college, Tim and I got engaged. My Mom was so happy, it seemed to be something we could finally connect together about again. We started planning the wedding, found my dress, tasted cake, picked out flowers. She was still pretty sick, but she did her best to be an involved Mom, just like I'd always known her. Then, in August of 2004, just 4 months before my wedding, she had another "episode". I happened to be in town at a friend's for the weekend and I rushed in the middle of the night to the emergency room to meet my sister. As I drove the song "How Do I Live" by Leann Rimes came on the radio and tears were coming so hard that I consider it another small miracle I made the drive in one peice. "How do I, Get through one night without you, if I had to live without you, what kind of life would that be?" Deep down, I don't know how, but I knew.

I met my sister in the ER, Mom was having scans done to check her brain for stroke. It came back with no signs of typical stroke activity, just as it always had. They brought her back to the room and she was awake. When she saw me she smiled a little, the same smile she always used to try to comfort me. Then, was trying to ask us something, but she couldn't get the words out or communicate. I could tell she was confused, frustrated, and scared. That was hard. I tried to reassure her, to let her know she was being taken care of. They moved her to a regular room, and sometime in the early morning she went to sleep. That was the last time I saw my Mom awake, or smile at me, or heard her voice. I wish this last memory was better, but to be honest, it just hurts. The next week is a blur of hospital rooms, Dr. theories, strings of hope, then seizures, ICU, and finally, the peace of hospice care.

The torment and struggle all seemed to calm down the moment hospice got involved, but we began another difficult process...letting go. After watching my Mom struggle and suffer for the week, I was ready for her to be at peace. It still hurt so much though, and there is a lot about that whole time that is still healing. We got to bring Mom home, though, and that was priceless. We set her up in the sitting room just outside my parent's bedroom and began the care and wait of dying. The hospice nurse was wonderful, and showed us how to mix and administer the medications to keep her out of seizures (watching your Mom have a Grand Mal seizure is something I don't wish on anyone) and keep her out of pain. The nurse told us the first day we were home that she thought my Mom would pass sometime that night...but she held on for days. I struggled, wondering what she was holding onto, and whether God was even there was to lift her up and help her. I remember a lot of these thoughts, mixed with laying with her in her bed, brushing her hair, putting lotion on her hands, singing lullabies to her with my sister at night, and telling her she could let go. Her care was round the clock, and we set alarms to help remember along with the meticulous charting of dosages (I was practicing for my future career). In the middle of the night I was up getting some of her medications ready. Our upstairs back deck is shaped like an L, and the kitchen window looks out onto the deck in front of the sitting room window. I was looking at the syringes on the counter and rinsing out a medicine cup when I glanced up, was startled seeing someone out there, so I looked up again and my mouth dropped along with the medicine cup I'd been holding. In front of the window to the sitting room I saw a man, his face looking at the window with compassion and concern, his arms spread with his palms to the sky, and there was a light around his whole being, especially around his head. His body was clothed in white and it seemed almost like a mirrage as it shimmered ever so slightly all around him. He looked in the window, and then up at the sky and then was gone from my sight. I realized we were being cared for deeply, and God was RIGHT THERE with us and I started shaking, and was still shaking but smiling when I walked into the sitting room. I looked at my sister and said, "I think I just saw an angel".

Doubters may question what I saw with ideas about sleep deprivation or the deep emotional state of grief I was in. That's fine, I've had two babies now, and I know what sleep deprivation does to me. I grieved and ached deeply for months and years, but have had no recurring visions like this. What my journey taught me was that God does hear, and in the deepest darkest moments he is there, and answers prayers. I still fall into doubt, and I will admit that because I love science and thinking things through that it is true that sometimes God and his plan just don't make a lot of sense. What I know is that my sense doesn't matter. When I read "Heaven is for Real" last night, I got goosebumps a few times, but one was because when the little boy, Colton, described the angels...it was just like what I remembered Mom's angel looked like. I put the book down, lay in bed smiling, and the thought suddenly came "I can't WAIT to see my Mom again" and I starting crying, again, with the grief and sadness, but also renewed hope. I got up to go finish crying and blow my nose in the bathroom so I wouldn't disturb Tim. We leave the Christian radio station on in my girls' room at night as background noise, and as I sat down to wipe my eyes I heard the song change and goosebumps jumped to my skin again:

"Dancing with the Angels", a song that started playing on the radio shortly after Mom's death and we actually played at my Wedding reception in honor of her. Yes God, I hear you, Thank you for being ever present in my heart just like I asked over 20 years ago.

If You Give Your Wife Permission to Paint the Bathroom

A cautionary tale about "small" home improvement projects

If you give your wife permission to paint the bathroom orange...

Before:

 She will ask what it would take to trade the dated vanity for the pedestal sink in your basement.

If you tell her you can swap the sinks, but you'll need to change the flooring because the ugly vinyl is cut around the vanity...

She will google search and fall in love with a glass tile floor.

If you buy her the glass tiles, mortar, grout, and all the corresponding tools...

You will both get so excited that you will immediately start tearing out the old floor.

If you start tearing out the old floor...

You will fine one... two layers of vinyl...

Followed by a layer of luan on top of... A layer of original 1950s linoleum...

Plus a layer of plywood before you finally reach the subfloor

And you will get so ahead of yourself that you have to leave a section, or you would have to pull out the toilet and sink before you are really even ready to get started.

If, a few days later, you get everything together and tear out the toilet, sink, and the rest of the floor...

You will find the flange for the toilet is 1 1/2 inches above the subfloor and is plumbed with a lead extender from the cast iron drain, so you will have to call a plumber to get their input on the situation.

If you call the plumber and get the go ahead to just cut the lead to the appropriate level and reinstall the flange...

You will finally be able to start with the mortar and cement backerboard. Of couse you will only be able to start after you put the kids to bed and will have to stay up until approximately 1am.

If you lay the cement backerboard underlayer for your tile

Your project will be ready for your wife to paint the bathroom.

If your toilet and sink are removed, layer of flooring is in but not finished, and your wife finishes painting the bathroom...

You will notice that the rough in plumbing for the sink is only about 8 inches from the edge of the tub and you will decide to call a plumber "just to see how much it will cost to move the rough in a few inches"

If you call plumbers on a Friday to come check out your rough in...

They will tell you they cannot come out until Monday, so you will decide to go ahead and lay the glass tile floor.

If you lay the glass tile floor on Saturday and then grout on Sunday giving the appropriate curing times...

You will realize the plumbers cannot come on Monday because the floor is not "walkable" yet so you will have to reschedule for Tuesday and Wednesday.

If the plumber comes on Tuesday to check out the rough ins...

He will tell you that the supply lines are copper, which is good, but the drain pipe is lead and not only would be impossible to move without replacing, but also should probably be replaced anyway because it will fail at some point.

If you ask what replacing the drain pipe entails...

He will tell you he will have to plumb over to the cast iron drain stack that runs behind the toilet which requires extensive work and will cost a few hundred dollars, essentially doubling the cost of your "small" project.

If you talk with your wife for a few days about the bathroom plumbing situation...

You will both decide that you would rather avoid a leak in the future so you will open up almost an entire wall so that you can call and schedule the plumber.

If you finally schedule the plumber to come a week and a half after originally checking out the rough ins to repair your bathroom plumbing ...

You will have to make a useable bathroom out of three rooms in your house: the still useable bathtub in this room, the downstairs for toilet, and the kitchen for the sink.

Kitchen stuff+Bathroom stuff+Construction stuff= Disorganized mess

If you schedule the plumber to come and do extensive work on this bathroom's plumbing...

You will also get curious about the rest of the bathroom plumbing and decide to open up the wall in the bathroom directly under your project so you can see where ALL the drains go.

If you open up all these walls to see what is going on with the plumbing...

The plumber will discover a way to plumb the new drain and fix all the other bathroom plumbing (and a leak in another pipe pro-bono), all for the same price as the original plan! (Hey, celebrate the small victories) You will also find that the culprit lead drain pipe already has a hairline crack at a bend and was slightly leaking, which makes you feel slightly better about the whole fiasco.

If the old, out-of-date plumbing gets repaired with shiny, new copper and PVC...

You will finally be ready to put the bathroom back together again and decide that since you've already torn out the whole wall you might as well replace the old, rusty,medicine cabinet/light fixture too.


If you prepare the wiring to install the new light fixture...

You will mistake a live wire for a ground wire and electrify the entire chrome fixture so that when you are measuring from the top of the wall to the copper pipes to cut the drywall you will ground the new circuit and zap yourself...three times...before taking the light fixture down.

If your wife calls her Dad for help the next morning who comes over to take a look, and then calls his electrician friend for help...

You will discover your error with the help of a voltimeter and be able to move forward, put up new drywall, tape and mud, have your wife repaint the wall, and move onto "finish" work.

If you want to replace missing tiles in the wall, install baseboard and shoe, recaulk and regrout sections of the bathtub, caulk around the bottom of the wall and floor, put up the new light and mirror, and reinstall the sink and toilet on a Monday and hope to be pretty much done for your wifes birthing class on Tuesday...

Your wife will work her fingers to the bone all day scraping old caulk and grout out from around the tub and you will both be up until all hours of the night trying to get the above list done (hey, we didn't write it all out and think about how extensive the list actually was...it was just supposed to be "finish" work)

If you try to get all the above work done by staying up until all hours of the night...

You will get to the point of installing the toilet, the tank will leak, your wife will cry, and you will crawl into bed defeated at 5am.

If you get defeated after staying up all night but still have half of the "finish" work left to do...

You will pretty much end up taking the day off in order to fix the toilet tank leak (turns out the new seal kit was a peice of sh** and our wonderful plumber, Greg, gave us a new one because he was just around the corner on another job), put in the sink, and put up the light and mirror.

If you want to reinstall the pedestal sink with pretty chrome pipes and decide to dry fit everything so you will know what you are doing before you mount it on the wall...

It will take a couple hours just to mount the sink on the pedestal and you will find that you cut one supply pipe too short and that the other supply line and the drain are leaking.

If you pick up the supplies for a new supply line and to fix the leaks...

You will stay up until 1 am that night trying to get the new supply line properly installed without leaks in the extremely cramped space behind the pedestal sink.

If you get the toilet, sink, and shower up and running again, your walls painted, and ready to finish up the cabinet...

You will discover the small patch peice you'd planned for the bottom of the door casing won't work because the old profile doesn't match so you will have to replace the entire thing...adding an extra full day to the project, necessitating more paint touch ups, and seriously irritating your wife.


If you patch things up, in the bathroom and with your wife, and finally finish "painting" your bathroom...

Your wife will be so happy with the result that she will ask to paint the kitchen ;-)

A Year of Financial Peace

Whew, it's been quite chaotic around here for a little while... lot's going on in life and mostly in very good ways. I told myself just a few months into doing Dave Ramsey's plan and seeing some results that I would share my journey after a year. I am so glad to say that I am as excited to do that now, after that year, as I was when we started. You may remember my post here about getting started Living Like No One Else. Well, here's what that has been like...

I remember so clearly a year ago and what a rude awakening it was to realize how little money we had left after our bills, and to realize that a third of our income was going out every month to debt that was NOT our house. I think the prayer and promise that came along with listening to Financial Peace University must have gone a long way because otherwise I probably would have just cried at the computer, not knowing how we would manage to make it all work. I prioritized food and our children, making sure we would be able to be fed and keep them diapered and clean. Then I allocated very modest amounts to envelopes. I was reasonable and did have an "entertainment" envelope and I can share with you all now that this envelope received a whopping $10 a month, yup that's right. We simply did not have anymore than that to put towards it. That gives you an idea of where we started, and I tried to be optimistic and move forward.

The first few months were pretty exciting, we were actually able to stick to the budget we made with a few adjustments we felt like we were doing great. We were also very blessed because our best friends started FPU last year and have been a HUGE support and partners in the "let's hang out, what do you have in your fridge for dinner tonight" kind of mentality. I know this has made the year considerable easier and more fun. Now, this year was relatively good to us but we also had our rough patches. My husband's job announced last summer that they no longer could afford to cover health insurance benefits at the same level, and that would add another $300 a month to our load. I admit, I cried quite a bit thinking "We finally got our act together and now this. We can't afford to go to out for a date, let alone another $300". Then I put my big girl panties on and got proactive. Dave mentioned in the class that a better route for a healthy family for health insurance was a High Deductible health insurance plan (cheaper per month) with an HSA. As a nurse, I thought this was brilliant, but high deductible means at least a few thousands bucks...a little scary for a young family just starting to get their finances together. So, when we started I thought "We'll look at that when we have our 3-6 month emergency fund in place"...but I am very thankful now that this info was in the back of our minds because when the shoe fell, I did some research. I did some internet searches, and then contacted one of the Endorsed Local Providers for Health Insurance to get some info and quotes, then Tim and I had a long talk. I can say that this process was pretty stressful and not super easy and that we have taken on a bigger risk than I would ideally like. That was our choice though, and when you weigh that risk against the extra $300 a month we would have paid anyways (and that's if rates wouldn't increase next year...yeah RIGHT) we basically took a risk that no major events (more expensive than our deductible) would occur more than once every 3 years. If this is true, than we still save money...which is actually pretty impressive. So, crisis averted and I put the money we saved every month (compared to our previous paychecks...not even the additional $300) towards an HSA and at this point already have $1200 in there. So thanks to Dave's info we are covered and in a BETTER place in that regard than before. We also had some surpise and not so surpise expenses that we were obligated to before Financial Peace, but those all got covered. All the while we worked off debt, by paying every bill, plus EVERY EXTRA PENNY we could squeeze from life in order to pay those off. We worked the HypnoBirthing, cakes, and overtime as much as possible and we sold stuff, not tons of stuff, but quite a bit of stuff to go toward that debt snowball.

When we started a year ago, I was hoping just to live successfully based on a plan, and if THAT could work than maybe to bring our bills down in a year to a place where we would at least break even every month and not have to rely on the "tax bonus". Well, this year has been more than I could even dream. We have lived successfully on this plan, and we've even lived well. We've found ways to still have fun, see movies, go out to eat occasionally, enjoy life. We had Christmas, and yes I spent almost every penny of that budget (just $4.50 left over), but I had NO GUILT after Christmas, I spent exactly what we had planned for Christmas this year. A big thing for me has been the actual Peace part of Financial Peace. I feel an incredible weight has lifted because I KNOW that we can manage our money and anything that comes our way from here on out. Also, it has been incredibly good for our marraige. We used to be stressed pretty regularly about money and maybe not have blow out fights, but definetely have arguments and I'd have the pit in my stomach feeling when it came to our finances. Now, I can remember the one "argument" we've had about money ALL YEAR, and it wasn't so much an argument, but me being upset that my husband had spent $30 while I was out of town that we hadn't planned on or talked about ahead of time. No biggie, we found another spot for that money to come out of, and it really was no big deal. The point is, that is the ONE AND ONLY time we've been in disagreement over money...all year...and we are in a better relationship because of this. It has become easy and important for us to communicate about where our money is going. There is enough in life to stress us out, it feels so good to not argue about money anymore.

The biggest news out of this entire year is where we are as of March. On March 11th I paid off our last credit card and our car loan, so as of last month we are now consumer debt free! (we still have student loans, which is why we are not yet debt free). I could not believe it, I literally cried because it felt so good. In just one year we have paid off  $18,532.69 in debt! It's crazy and if someone had told me last year that this is where we would be I probably would have laughed at them. This, also, more than covers our break even point as this reduces our monthly bills by about $475 A MONTH! I literally want to shout Dave Ramsey's name from the rooftops, because it IS WORKING, and I know that Living like no one else means that we WILL Live like no one else someday...and probably sooner than I imagined.

I got to sit down at the end of March and make our Monthly Cash Flow plan for April, and it was FUN. We decided to re-adjust our finances a little to make room in a few envelopes. We haven't had an envelope for adult clothes this year, and that worked while we needed to get intense and in control, but let's just say that I definetely wore through my jeans and a few other essenials. Not having a budget for clothes is just not sustainable, so now we do. Plus, we've budgeted more now so I can get my hair cut and colored regularly since I am supposed to be some what professional. We also increased a few other envelopes ($15 a month now for entertainment...wahoo!) just to give ourselves a little more breathing room as we keep working this plan and attacking our student loans. Tim has been fortunate enough to have quite a bit of overtime lately, and we are also rewarding ourselves with a bathroom mini-remodel...that story to come :) We'll still have a chunk of extra penny's, though, that I am excited to throw at his student loan.

It's only been a year and with Financial Peace, and we have not been able to call Dave yet for the DEBT FREEEEE!!!! scream, but I wanted to tell you all where we are because if we could do this ANYONE CAN. I want people to know and experience this amazing feeling of success and peace. So, think about it, what could you do with an extra $475 a month a year from now, or even better, what could you do if you had no debt? I'll let you know how it feels in a few years when we get there!